Men, here's to you:


When I am absolutely exasperated and teetering on the edge of tears I don't need my women friends to encourage me through whatever awfulness I amin the midst of- I need YOU. "Shhh, shhh, it is alright, my darling." I don't even necessarily need you to solve whatever it is, but I need a moments comfort and caring. It solves more than I can possibly say.


My secret pleasure, as many above have said, is to watch you, unawares - while you talk to the cats, read, or soak up a sunbeam. I see the child superimposed upon the man and so the two meet and become one and the joy I experience is complete.


I appreciate the simple amazement and gratitude you expressfor the things that I can do that you cannot - and I hope I express well enough the same enough for you to understand the converse of this as well.


I don't need you to bend steel bars or kill wild animals with your teeth. I want to know the contents of your mind as you wish me to know it and trust that we can discuss at length what is on your mind and what is on my mind- that we celebrate where we converge and diverge and that we have a lifetime for this activity.


I respect you the most when you stop me and say, "I have no idea what you are talking about - have no frame of reference - can you please explain?" and that you trust me enough to know that I will never ridicule your lack of knowledge on any particular subject. I love that I can say the same, "I don't know" and I know and my heart is full when you patiently explain and expand my knowledge.


I love when you show me your goofy side. The way you make up songs about nothing and you sing them to me. I laugh and laugh and you get more ridiculous and life is good.


The fact that you want to touch me is nearly as pleasing as when you do.


I am filled with love when you talk about your father and mother and your sister (or brothers) with respect and love and care.


I never tire of watching you go off on some tangent, and you really, fully /are/ willing to talk about this particular tangent until the end of time. The passion is there, the energy and you are ready to charge into ... oh, you noticed I'm doing my best tokeep up but I'm really not. And you know you've gone perhaps a smidge too far and you put it down and step away. It isn't about winning, it isn't about being more right. It's abouttwo people communicating and notalways at the same speeds.


You say, 'I enjoy doing this' and I say 'Hey I enjoy that too' -- and it doesn't become acompetition it becomesa project - a time for togetherness and for sharing.


Sometimes I am unclear - because I am afraid or from some long ago wound I cannot seem to pull to the light of day and examine - I stumble. I'm afraid to show you some of the scars on my heart. And you are there for me - supporting me unconditionally - until I can find the words to say.


Sometimes the boy inside bubbles to the top - and I can see him there - just underneath your manly exterior. I see wildness, boldness that is borne of not being entirely sure, hormones, past hurts and present concerns - I see you straighten - reassuring yourself and moving forward and I fall in love all over again.


Whether these are characterizations of one man or many they are moments I cherish and treasure. I believe they are inside /all/ men - the best of men. I love that as humans we remain teachable. Growth is for the curious and strong.


I believe it is the best of humanity that we can say


'I forgive'


'I believe in you'


'We can start this conversation over'


'I am afraid'


'I love'


'Please tell me how to comfort you, I don't know how'


'I am sorry.'


'Please touch me this way.'


'Would you do that again?'








"What a man, what a man, what a mighty good man." En Vogue