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scarlet13 scarlet13 is offline
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scarlet13 How many Fates turn around in the overtime?

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i agree with neardc. if i lived in Chicago i'd be all over you- i love motorcycles, festivals and live music.

anyhoo, good for you for making the effort to improve your profile, and not just giving up. good luck!
- May 14th, 2009, 07:51 pm
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Bandmate Bandmate is offline
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neardc wrote :
What's your point? Are you calling the OP desperate? Do you by chance have something constructive to offer him?

To the OP... I assume (hope...lol) that you inadvertently pasted in one of your responses three times, and that they in fact read as follows:



I actually like your responses for the most part. Your strong focus on family and children may be a turn-off for some, though (e.g., they may feel that you won't have enough time for them, or they may not to get involved with a man with kids), but those women aren't likely to be a good match for you anyway.

Motorcycles are another turn-off for some, but if biking is a big part of what you enjoy, they may as well know upfront. If your pictures also consist of lots of ones of you with your bike, though, then it might come across that your bike is a bigger part of your life than someone who doesn't share that interest might want to acccomodate.

I would move the statement about concerts from the "passion" section to the leisure time section. Those two sections are actually somewhat redundant with each other, so I recommend figuring out what really fits in the section about what you are most passionate about, and what better fits into the section on leisure activities.

Or, maybe the women closing you just don't like the Bears...haha.

My point is that for a website that prides itself on being different from all the others and so much more in depth and not about externals,and the 27 or so other"dimensions" it appears that it's just the same old thing,sell,sell,sell...polish and shine.The op does seem like a good man...but he need's to be a good man +...a good man and ....a good man with accessories.The constructive thing i would offer him is to be himself and not worry about being tailor made to any woman,that's certainly the dominant attitude among women here...accept me as i am,take me as i am...love it or leave it...while men are supposed to examine themselves and make themselves worthy.

The fact is that if anyone is ever going to love a person for who they are,another common phrase around here,that person will have to be honest about themselves....when you begin to complicate,adorn and accesorize honesty lies are not far away,if women are going to be as picky and demanding as some of them are and not accept simple truth in simple terms,and instead prefer shaksperian eloquence and a man becomes desperate some lies are going to be told.,and women wonder why there are so many lying"creative" men who can't tell the simple truth about anything....that is why desperation is a sad thing....in the end it produces saddness...imho
Last edited by Bandmate; May 15th, 2009 at 04:55 am.
- May 15th, 2009, 04:42 am
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DancingFool DancingFool is offline
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Well.....your profile is redundant. You repeat the same thing about family and children three times - that's like taking a brick and smacking a woman over the head three times. Yes, we all know that family and children are important - we are not stupid. You are overstating the blatantly obvious three times in an almost identical manner. That's bad.

My impression reading your profile is that you are likely that unhealthy obsessive sort of a parent/guy. Now this is likely not your intent at all and not what you are like in real life, however that is how you are coming across. Another interpretation would be that you are looking for an instant mother to your children. Women who date have also met quite a few of those guys. They really don't even want to get to know you, they are just desperate for a replacement wife. Not exactly someone you'd want to date even if you share family values. If I read your profile I'd close you out in a flash. Why not give you the benefit of the doubt? Because you are competing with many other matches and those matches are better.

So, find other things to talk about, don't overstate the obvious and don't be repetitive. Good luck to you.
- May 15th, 2009, 05:01 am
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scarlet13 scarlet13 is offline
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scarlet13 How many Fates turn around in the overtime?

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Bandmate wrote :
My point is that for a website that prides itself on being different from all the others and so much more in depth and not about externals,and the 27 or so other"dimensions" it appears that it's just the same old thing,sell,sell,sell...polish and shine.The op does seem like a good man...but he need's to be a good man +...a good man and ....a good man with accessories.The constructive thing i would offer him is to be himself and not worry about being tailor made to any woman,that's certainly the dominant attitude among women here...accept me as i am,take me as i am...love it or leave it...while men are supposed to examine themselves and make themselves worthy.

The fact is that if anyone is ever going to love a person for who they are,another common phrase around here,that person will have to be honest about themselves....when you begin to complicate,adorn and accesorize honesty lies are not far away,if women are going to be as picky and demanding as some of them are and not accept simple truth in simple terms,and instead prefer shaksperian eloquence and a man becomes desperate some lies are going to be told.,and women wonder why there are so many lying"creative" men who can't tell the simple truth about anything....that is why desperation is a sad thing....in the end it produces saddness...imho
i think you are missing the point. noone is telling him to change who he is, it's about adjusting your profile so your personality comes through the way you want it to. some people have problems expressing themselves clearly in writing.
- May 15th, 2009, 11:10 am
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Bandmate Bandmate is offline
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scarlet13 wrote :
i think you are missing the point. noone is telling him to change who he is, it's about adjusting your profile so your personality comes through the way you want it to. some people have problems expressing themselves clearly in writing.

Maybe so,the one reason i always say that looks matter to me is because all of the women's profiles i get say the same thing,walks on the beach,candleight dinners,time with the children,they all "love life" and want to "live it to the fullest"...they are all "happy" "positive" cheerful thrifty and brave...they all have at least 10 to 15 different hobbies....on and on ad infinitum..... in the end the only thing that sets any of them apart is their looks,when i finish reading i don't know if i want to go ona date or buy a new car.I took about one and a half paragraphs to describe myself and my only hobby which is music....whatever happend to simplicity ? and the simple truth ?
- May 15th, 2009, 02:54 pm
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Oregon_Coast_Guy Oregon_Coast_Guy is offline
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You also say you're a Bears fan more than once. You only need to say ANYTHING on your profile once. People can read, lol.
- May 15th, 2009, 05:31 pm
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Bandmate wrote :
Maybe so,the one reason i always say that looks matter to me is because all of the women's profiles i get say the same thing,walks on the beach,candleight dinners,time with the children,they all "love life" and want to "live it to the fullest"...they are all "happy" "positive" cheerful thrifty and brave...they all have at least 10 to 15 different hobbies....on and on ad infinitum..... in the end the only thing that sets any of them apart is their looks,when i finish reading i don't know if i want to go ona date or buy a new car.I took about one and a half paragraphs to describe myself and my only hobby which is music....whatever happend to simplicity ? and the simple truth ?
Hence my profile workshop in the Using eHarmony Forum. To help people write a profile that 1) expresses who they are and 2) sets them apart.

Come on over!
http://advice.eharmony.com/boards/da...ate-about.html
- May 15th, 2009, 06:35 pm
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neardc,
Thank you for holding "Bandmate" accountable for his knuckle dragging neanderthal post. - Nuff said.
- May 16th, 2009, 11:41 am
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