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mypoostinks mypoostinks is offline
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Simply, how do you do it, especially if you have never done it and see yourself as a one-woman man. It's weird thinking this way after being with someone for so long and now being divorced and single again.

I've started talking to a few women on eH and am fast approaching first dates. Do you tell each one that you are dating others? Do you just play it by ear and see how things go? I'm so confused, but I guess it's a good problem to have!

Thanks for any pointers, suggestions, and advice.
- March 10th, 2008, 08:09 pm
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ucmecucme ucmecucme is offline
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One woman man - welcome to the world of internet dating - When is going for a coffee (when you are single) make it immoral to go for an icecream with another? maybe when you have met theright person BUT you arent even at that stage - meet or dont meet everyone on your list - being a one man woman doesnt make you exclusive to one woman until you have an emotional reason to be exclusive, does it?

Be upfront and say you have been meeting a few from online and still looking around to see who is out there - if they are interesed they will figure it out with you - if not then it is no great loss anyway!

Typically, on the first "date" aren't you actually meeting someone with whom you have supposedly similar attributes? Heck, they might actually have a snork or a frown that doesnt do it for you - do you tell them you are seeing others?

And if you find someone you want to see again - just stop dating others and be honest about it to yourself - the conversation may or may not come up as to who or what you were dating before "the one" comes along

or book them all in at 3 hour intervals and do a different activity with them all on just one weekend - then you are speed dating and can make an informed decision without causing yourself the long term headache!

Oh, and have a list of questions written in dot point form on the back of a business card and if you forget them you can go to the bathroom or grab a drink and read them!

good Luck







- March 10th, 2008, 08:53 pm
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Aussie_in_USA Aussie_in_USA is offline
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I just take it one day at a time. It's not like you're really dating. You're 'hanging out'.



Plus, it keeps men on their toes.
- March 11th, 2008, 09:50 am
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brit_rose brit_rose is offline
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IMO i think its ok to 'date' more than 1 person, as long as you are in the early stages. I would hope, however, that it wont take you very many dates to figure out which one is the one you'd rather be with, and let the others know ASAP, without stringing them along, just in case it doesnt work out.
- March 12th, 2008, 10:53 am
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speaking_heart speaking_heart is offline
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To remain virgin or not is totally in girls hand.If they do not entertail boys who are inclined towards sex..no body in the world can force you...girls can use their brains better than men when it comes to sex...becoz boys will be boys and most of them do think about sex.$ex and$ex..so its the girls who can change the boys....and decide whether you wanna lead a dogs life....or a pure human being...
- March 13th, 2008, 12:24 am
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Blonde_Ambition Blonde_Ambition is offline
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There is no problem in dating more than one person. As long as everyone is informed of the situation and understands that you mean no harm, i see no problem.

It is only when a relationship is mutually decided to be exclusive that dating other people must end.

Honestly i just enjoy meeting new people and having fun with dating. it is afterall meant to be a pleasurable experience and i intend to keep it that way.

good luck!
- March 19th, 2008, 10:17 pm
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Cathie Cathie is offline
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mypoostinks, wrote :

Simply, how do you do it, especially if you have never done it and see yourself as a one-woman man. It's weird thinking this way after being with someone for so long and now being divorced and single again.

I've started talking to a few women on eH and am fast approaching first dates. Do you tell each one that you are dating others? Do you just play it by ear and see how things go? I'm so confused, but I guess it's a good problem to have!

Thanks for any pointers, suggestions, and advice.
Hi, I know how you feel. I tried talking to a few men at one time and it didn't work. Even though I told the 3 of them that I'm talking to 2 other men, it didn't go over too well. They each felt that I should make a choice and decide whoI wanted to be with.

But I realized, as I was chatting with the 3 of them, that mentally I had made up my mind and I'm happy with the choice I've made.

I think you should talk to a few women and see who you connect with. Then talk for a while and see what happens.

Good luck.







- March 20th, 2008, 01:48 pm
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BSchorr BSchorr is offline
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Blonde_Ambition wrote :

There is no problem in dating more than one person. As long as everyone is informed of the situation and understands that you mean no harm, i see no problem.

It is only when a relationship is mutually decided to be exclusive that dating other people must end.

Honestly i just enjoy meeting new people and having fun with dating. it is afterall meant to be a pleasurable experience and i intend to keep it that way.

good luck!
I think she stated it very well.

Speaking personally I have a hard time dating (early stages of course) more than 1 or 2 people at a time because that's the stage where I'm just getting to know them and it's just too hard for me to keep straight who is whom. :-)

It's embarassing to be on a date and not be able to remember if she's the one who went to Florida State or if she's the one whose father was a rodeo clown.

So I tend to be rather "sequential" about things and date 1, or at most 2, at a time. Just for practical reasons though, not moral ones.

-B-
- March 21st, 2008, 01:55 pm
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movingalong movingalong is offline
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I agree w bschorr. I date one match at a time for practical reasons. If I get through the questions and OC with someone, I think he deserves a fair shake without the distraction/competition of others to muddy up the process. That said, if the guy I'm working on is dating other people, it doesn't bother me -- but it does keep me from investing emotionally. Sometimes that's a good thing, so at the outset let the guy know that I'm a one-man woman, though I don't expect him to operate the same way.
- March 22nd, 2008, 08:33 am
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Lexie316 Lexie316 is offline
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I think you can "date" as many as you want as long as you aren't physical with all (or any) of them. I was dating a guy from eH and things seemed to be moving towards a future. After taking it slow, we decided to kiss... after a month I found out he was dating other women. I do not want to be kissing a guy who is kissing other women! This guy was even so bold to say to me "What you and I are doing is dating, the other woman, was just *A* date!" But then later he even admitted he had kissed her too, and that there were more than one. So I ended it. He was upset saying he wanted to keep dating me. Well, then if you want to date me, why would you be dating others?

So yeah, I think people should choose just one person to date, once you get beyond the first few dates.

Oh, and yes for practical reasons as well. I find it hard to keep the guys straight too, when we are just talking on the phone and haven't even met in person yet!
- March 22nd, 2008, 02:17 pm
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