Advice and Support from Thousands of Users Just Like You

Dating First-date jitters? Hoping for a second date? Moving on to a full blown relationship? Share your journey and advice here.

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
PhotoSavy's Avatar

PhotoSavy Enjoying the day!

Quick Study

Join Date: Jun 2008

Posts: 183

See profile

Seriously, it is all about confidence. It doesn't matter about the weight. If a person is confident in whom they are and they are happy to be around, then that draws attraction. If you can have common activities that you can do with one another it's a plus...walks along the beach, hikes, bike riding, then it reaches both goals...having fun together while helping with the weight loss and increase an energy. While I don't sit home and eat bon, bon’s I try to say active. It’s tough on women who are over 45 and as long as my guy sees that I am active, happy and confident then it's ok. If a man doesn't get that...then next!fficeffice" />>>

Last edited by PhotoSavy; August 15th, 2009 at 07:08 pm.
- August 15th, 2009, 07:04 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#361   Reply With Quote
roguewolf1's Avatar

roguewolf1 Zack found his calling as tailgate party chef

Pacesetter

Join Date: Jul 2009

Posts: 296

See profile

PhotoSavy wrote :
Seriously, it is all about confidence. It doesn't matter about the weight. If a person is confident in whom they are and they are happy to be around, then that draws attraction. If you can have common activities that you can do with one another it's a plus...walks along the beach, hikes, bike riding, then it reaches both goals...having fun together while helping with the weight loss and increase an energy. While I don't sit home and eat bon, bon’s I try to say active. It’s tough on women who are over 45 and as long as my guy sees that I am active, happy and confident then it's ok. If a man doesn't get that...then next!fficeffice" />>>

Are you saying it's ok for women to lie about their weight? Are you also saying women over 45 have a harder time losing weight than men over 45? Lastly if a woman lies and the guy shows up to find her much larger in person or morbidly obese and he doesn't like her, then f him?
- August 15th, 2009, 07:19 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#362   Reply With Quote
HappyandLight's Avatar

Pacesetter

Join Date: Jul 2009

Posts: 259

See profile

la_angel wrote :
I agree that people should post current photos of themselves - no argument there. But the fact that you found a woman that you say is interesting and attractive but you couldn't be 'truly interested' in unless she loses weight, that's just downright wrong. Is it because you would be embarassed to be seen with her as is, or what? Sounds to me like you should just move on until you find your 'right-sized' woman and let her find someone who will appreciate her for who she is.
Why is this wrong? When people are looking for a mate, they are not just looking for a friend but someone they are attracted to and want to have sex with. One cannot control their attraction, it just IS. And I don't blame them. I have nothing against fat people as people but to expect people to accept them and be *just* as attracted to them as to slender folks, that is just not realistic or fair.

By the way, I am female and slender. I love the inner qualities of my boyfriend...he is intelligent, noble, funny, sweet, etc BUT if he was too fat when I met him I'd have to say "no". Sorry, I don't want to make love with a fat man. And it's understandable...it does not make one superficial...we like people who have a balanced life, eat normal portions and are fit.

It's just how things are. If fatter people want more love in their lives, get their eating/exercise lives in order. It's much better than arguing that things aren't fair.
- August 15th, 2009, 07:21 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#363   Reply With Quote
roguewolf1's Avatar

roguewolf1 Zack found his calling as tailgate party chef

Pacesetter

Join Date: Jul 2009

Posts: 296

See profile

OP I would say just enjoy yourself on the date. She might be a great lady and you might find a friend. So stick around the date and enjoy it. I've found some heavy women to be
sensous, great conversationalists, loyal friends and fun to be with. Also hot in bed.

It's happened to me more than once but hey, I'm not perfect. Who am I to judge? This is the internet, we are all on a job interview here putting our best face on.

Some bbw make better friends
and partners.

Last edited by roguewolf1; August 15th, 2009 at 07:26 pm.
- August 15th, 2009, 07:23 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#364   Reply With Quote
Bouffy's Avatar

Bouffy isn't as easy to see through as you think.

Quick Study

Join Date: Jul 2008

Posts: 101

See profile

robert2008 wrote :
Now in the second case, the woman was pretty interesting and attractive in person, but clearly weighed about 200 lbs. (5'6"), although on her profile she described her body type as 'average'. Regardless of anything else, 5'6" and 200 lbs is not "average"..
*drool* More like above average! Who wants regular anyways?

Where can I find a yummy muffin like that? I don't see the problem here, are you skinny or something? I'm 6'3; 240; This size of girl is great! Curvy and Delicious. As long as she's active and not out of shape. I love big girls.

You hear me world?!

Big girls, you are beautiful.
Fat bottom girls you make my rocking world go 'round!
Eat all the fries you want baby! We can work 'em out later ;p
- August 15th, 2009, 07:27 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#365   Reply With Quote

ADVERTISEMENT

HappyandLight's Avatar

Pacesetter

Join Date: Jul 2009

Posts: 259

See profile

k374 wrote :
you really cannot compare lack of height in a man to being overweight in a woman. Lack of height is purely superficial, it doesn't make a man less healthy or less capable. Weight on the other hand is the result of a poor lifestyle, a lack of discipline to take care of your own body and that is definitely not a positive trait.

Not implying that overweight women are bad people but their lifestyle would not be compatible with someone who is not overweight and is active..they just would not be able to keep up! Therefore they are not a match!
You said it! We all want what we want. I eat a natural food diet that is pretty clean. Naturally I am attracted to men who appreciate this style of eating. I like it because it makes a person look their best...so I would be turned off to a person who ate crappy food and didn't care and didn't exercise.

Also, if a person overeats it's a sign of lack of discipline or gluttony...not attractive.

Now, I know overweight women can be great women! And beautiful! And I know you have lots of great qualities...but please stop saying someone is superficial if they don't want your brand. It is a preference and a justified preference.

I know I do not want a fat man.
- August 15th, 2009, 07:29 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#366   Reply With Quote
neardc's Avatar

Volunteer Community Leader

Join Date: Jun 2008

Posts: 5,046

See profile

roguewolf1 wrote :
Are you saying it's ok for women to lie about their weight? Are you also saying women over 45 have a harder time losing weight than men over 45? Lastly if a woman lies and the guy shows up to find her much larger in person or morbidly obese and he doesn't like her, then f him?
How the heck did you get this out of her statement...lol?

(Men do, on average, have faster metabolisms than women because of their higher muscle mass, which burns more calories. So, yeah; it is more difficult for women over 45 to lose weight than men over 45, especially for post-menopausal women. That doesn't mean that "this" particular woman will have a more difficult time than "that" particular man, but overall it is certainly true.. )
- August 15th, 2009, 07:30 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#367   Reply With Quote
landstar59's Avatar

landstar59 is being thankful for what she's got.

Veteran

Join Date: Apr 2008

Posts: 1,548

See profile

Bouffy wrote :
*drool* More like above average! Who wants regular anyways?

Where can I find a yummy muffin like that? I don't see the problem here, are you skinny or something? I'm 6'3; 240; This size of girl is great! Curvy and Delicious. As long as she's active and not out of shape. I love big girls.

You hear me world?!

Big girls, you are beautiful.
Fat bottom girls you make my rocking world go 'round!
Eat all the fries you want baby! We can work 'em out later ;p
The women are gonna love you! Why aren't you closer in age to me? You're a hunk!
- August 15th, 2009, 07:37 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#368   Reply With Quote
CreolePrincess's Avatar

CreolePrincess It is so complicated, ya'll, and it doesn't even have to be.

Virtuoso

Join Date: May 2009

Posts: 2,568

See profile

I say that if you're not physically attracted to her, that's your preference. I'm sure there's someone else out there for you as well as there is someone else out there for her. You shouldn't go into a second date thinking you want to change aspects of her. Talk with her, tell her you think that the two of you would make better friends and move on. After all, you don't know why she's overweight. It could be a physical problem or that she's within the last year picked up a lot of weigh because of depression or something like that and is having a hard time getting it off. Actually, the reason why isn't something important where you would be concerned if you're not accepting of her as she is. But don't try to change her or even ask her to change. That decision should be hers independently.
- August 15th, 2009, 07:48 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#369   Reply With Quote
organizedmayhem's Avatar

organizedmayhem Hanging in there

Quick Study

Join Date: Aug 2009

Posts: 90

See profile

Bouffy wrote :
*drool* More like above average! Who wants regular anyways?

Where can I find a yummy muffin like that? I don't see the problem here, are you skinny or something? I'm 6'3; 240; This size of girl is great! Curvy and Delicious. As long as she's active and not out of shape. I love big girls.

You hear me world?!

Big girls, you are beautiful.
Fat bottom girls you make my rocking world go 'round!
Eat all the fries you want baby! We can work 'em out later ;p
Mercy!! Where can we get more of you?
- August 15th, 2009, 07:52 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#370   Reply With Quote

ADVERTISEMENT

Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“Gosh, you have energy. I would have been burnt out chasing between homes in the mornings. I have no problems with relationships moving fast, even if he had asked you to get married after only 3 ... ” – Daphnie

Join the “Advice Needed -- What's Next?” discussion

“Just got back from MN, visited with my Mom and 2 of my sisters had a great time flights not so great. Looked for a new hat for TL2 no luck all I saw was grown men with Vikings jerseys on (# 4) wonder ... ” – dahlimema

Join the “Monday November 23rd weekend & date roundup!” discussion

“ So, people, here are my questions for you: Did you ever get in the wrong line yourself? Yes Did you do it deliberately, or inadvertently? Both, I do get in the Express line with more items if ... ” – yoga_gal

Join the “Ever been Caught in the Wrong Line?” discussion

“ That is the warm feeling we get all the way down to our toes and the chill we get up the back of our spine when we eat a bite of ice cream.” – mikeinor

Join the “Is everyone but me dating?” discussion

“I took the test and I need the Excellence Creme Brown with Natural Tone! Great giveaway! Thanks! senekers@comcast.net” – sharonjo

Join the “L'Oréal's 'Find Your Fall Hair Color' Sweepstakes!” discussion

“ It's really an "inaction" figure. The cats will wrap around her feet and trip her onto the couch, pinning her down until she spends the next hour brushing their coats while they all watch "Dog ... ” – Shelby

Join the “No Excuse for this thread...” discussion

“It just takes some time to get comfortable with each other. I think my boyfriend started spending the entire weekend after our third date, and we've spent every weekend since then together. The ... ” – trackstar

Join the “what to do... second guessing myself” discussion



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 07:13 pm.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2009, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
SEO by vBSEO 3.3.0