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aniccadhamma aniccadhamma is offline
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LeonardoMystic wrote :
I close out matches often for the reasons as follow:


1. You have time to sign up, you have time to fill out your profile. Nothing will make me close a match faster than an incomplete profile. If you had time to create one and take the Compatibility Test, then you can make time again to fill out that profile. This includes a clear photograph. I prefer matches who have a photo so I can see who I'm talking to.


2. Be intelligent. Is it so hard to be clean and clear cut in your sentences? Define paragraphs; don't crowd everything together, and be careful about spelling and grammar. When in doubt, consult a dictionary.


3. Be descriptive. You're telling us about yourself so those who are interested can formulate a good opinion of you so you don't end in the pile of millions of closed matches. I hate the one liners and the "ask me if u want to know".


4. While I am a Christian and it's great to have my match Christian, that's not all who I am. It shouldn't be what you're all about either. I want to know hobbies, favorite foods, TV shows, etc. More often than not I get Matches where in each and every question all they do is talk about God or anything religious.


Number 4 is the one that's been peeving me most lately. I am getting downright sick of it. I can't formulate a good opinion on a Match if all they answer is with religion. Why won't you say anything else about your life in your profile? I know your religion can't be all who you are.

Regarding number 4 above, I just changed my profile to accept other religious preferences because all I was getting was God this, and God that, and fluffy spiritual cliches. I want to know who YOU are, not who Jesus is, or even who God/Jesus says you are.

The other big thing that makes me want to reach for the close button is ALL CAPS. Yeesh, stop shouting at me!
- September 4th, 2009, 01:47 pm
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mariajdav mariajdav is offline
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Aside from not posting a photo - self portraits are a peeve. I wonder why it is that they don't have a friend to take their picture. Or, they should pay for a professional photo. The creepiest are photos taken in restrooms - private and public.
- September 4th, 2009, 01:58 pm
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Chap4u Chap4u is offline
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INCOMPLETE SHORT PROFILES = I am just here for the FREE WEEKEND
- September 4th, 2009, 02:01 pm
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melman melman is online now
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Tina_B313 wrote :
They need to have a list of unacceptable" hobbies" and activities that we can check off.
You've already proven that this would be a nightmare for eH to maintain and would result in tons of complaints. Suppose "golf" was on the list. You said golf on TV was OK but not playing golf for real. (Or maybe the opposite. I forget, and it doesn't matter anyway.)

The point is, that eH screens for you based on the compatibility questionnaire which is based on values. You have to do the rest of the work yourself.
- September 4th, 2009, 02:05 pm
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captnc46 captnc46 is offline
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I can't believe how many of you have the same reasons for closing a match as I do. I got so sick of incomplete profiles and no photo that I put in my profile that I would close immediately for those two reasons.
Also, if you like pets, fine, but to say your 8 cats are the most important thing in your life is down right scary. It makes me think of the crazy cat lady on Family Guy or is it the Simpsons, I forget.
One more thing (actually there are many more things, but I'll stop here). Every match I've gotten where the woman has a kid and she says so in her profile, says that they are the smartest, greatest, most well behaved child ever, really? I got to Walmart like many people and the odds of all of you having such great kids is well, a really big number.
There is one more thing (alright, I lied) If you put in your profile that your life is so busy and crazy that you don't have time for a relationship then why are you in here? Believe it or not, if you want a relationship that's worth anything you're going to have to put some time into it.
- September 4th, 2009, 02:11 pm
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JonCanuck JonCanuck is offline
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Nylit wrote :
First thing to get me to close a match is immediately,,, when I read "Physically fit"
I am healthy and able to do what I want but as far as being physically fit in someone else's eyes that means usually stacked...I am heavy so that is an immediate turn off for me. If your that worried about yourself ,,you have no time for me. ...
To me physically fit means exactly that! I am very active and fit myself, much more than most people (even those 1/2 my age). So of course I want physically fit, even if she says she enjoys hiking and some other activites I do. We need to be on a similar level or it isn't going to work. And "stacked" (I presume you mean breast size) doesn't matter. I think most truly fit women aren't well endowed in that area, anyhow.

And being worried about being fit doesn't mean not having time for another person. It is a lifestyle choice - and you obviously choose not to live an active lifestyle. No judgement calls there, just the fact of choices.
- September 4th, 2009, 02:13 pm
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thBigham thBigham is offline
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"When people answer questions with meaningless declarations like "I am passionate about living life to the fullest!" or hybrids of various cliches such as "Life is full of its ups and downs so I always pick myself up and start again and have great hopes for the future" or bemusing run-on sentences in the manner of, "I am hoping to better myself every day and gain new experiences and knowledge that will help me better able to support my family, friends, and future partner and become more successful at my job," I start popping Pepto-Bismol."

That thar's quite a run on sentence!

Probably have to close you out....
- September 4th, 2009, 02:43 pm
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JonCanuck JonCanuck is offline
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gDate wrote :
Another thing - motorcycles. Please! Grow up! Click.
Grow up? Having a bike doesn't automatically mean immaturity any more than owning a $150,000 car does. It's sad if that's all you've seen in motorcyclists. It's just a mode of transportation. It's more environmentally friendly than anything on 4 wheels, and lot more convenient in many ways. If I lived in a place where the weather made a bike more practical (it snows up to 6 months of the year here), I'd use that instead of a car as my primary transportation. No, I don't own a bike. But I see the practicality in one. And NOT a sport bike (for a variety of reasons).
- September 4th, 2009, 02:47 pm
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Chiara Chiara is offline
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Chiara Modern, Mature, Intellectual Catholic Woman

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mca wrote :
OK - too many responses to make!!


Certainly incomplete profiles suggest this person is not really into being here, so why should I bother?

I'll definitely also go along with the remarks about grammar - perhaps the "how-to's" need to include "keep a word processing program open so that you can spell-check your details, then copy and paste your responses"

No photo WITH any of the above, and I'll close immediately - my impression is that you are not really interested in meeting someone, so you are wasting my time

Now my two additions:

Flexible Match - this is very frustrating... I've spent time and money, made my preferences known, and I get 'no-picture' flexible match who is 6 inches shorter than me and who has an incomplete profile

Worse yet, the Pièce de résistance? Can anybody tell me why people do not respond? not to a photo request, not to questions, or to a nudge after you've sent your first questions? Again, why spend time and money to be here if you do not want to connect with someone - what's your angle?... have the courtesy to at least close the match!!
Whew... I'm glad THAT's off my chest
AMEN! AMEN! AMEN! It drives me wild when people (men in my case) on eHarmony do not respond, ever-even after me giving them a month! A month is enough time for someone to return to civilization. How about the ones who just stop communicating mid-process? Or, better yet, the ones with whom you are matched more than once? Yes, I was matched to the same man twice, he living in two different locations. This is supposed to be a "No-No" on eHarmony but even when I told eH., they just told me to give the young man time to respond. Hmmmmm...who is clueless, now?


I have not given up hope on finding my future husband on eH. but I become more stoic about my matches as time goes on. Peace and all good! ;-)
Last edited by Chiara; September 4th, 2009 at 02:58 pm.
- September 4th, 2009, 02:56 pm
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SusanEB SusanEB is offline
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My pet peeves:
  1. pour speling an gramer
  2. SHOUTING
  3. Incomplete profi
  4. Stating I'm just here for the weekend or until xxx date. If you can't make a commitment, why should I?
  5. Photos where you are posing, shirtless, tells me you are stuck on yourself.
- September 4th, 2009, 03:01 pm
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