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Willow18214's Avatar

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As an educated person, it is a huge turn off if a man can't string together a decent sentence. It's worse if his profile shows he has an 'educated' profession. That combination makes me think he may be lying about his profession or he really doesn't care much about finding someone or he'd put more effort into his profile.

I also agree with other posters that vauge or cliche answers are turn offs.
- September 4th, 2009, 04:17 pm
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HappyK's Avatar

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I agree with you about the importance of good grammar, spelling, etc. but I've noticed that EHarmony hasn't created enough space to provide important information regarding "what you are most passionate about". Because I'm passionate about many things and wanted to mention at least several, I was forced to abbreviate, keep sentences short, etc. That was a little frustrating. I was almost tempted to contact EH and ask them to create more space. While a profile should capture the essence of who we are, hopefully we'll remember that a few answers to questions on 1 piece of paper will never paint the full picture. I might add that while e-mail serves a great purpose, I've discovered how important it is to MEET in order to put all the pieces of the puzzle together!
- September 4th, 2009, 04:24 pm
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JonCanuck's Avatar

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Nylit wrote :
Well, you got me there, Jon,,I am nowhere near a mountain or I might give it a try. Heck, we don't have any hills here either. If you see a hill,, someone's buried in it. LOL! Good luck in your search and adventures.
Thanks! You, too.
- September 4th, 2009, 04:45 pm
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Chiara's Avatar

Chiara Modern, Mature, Intellectual Catholic Woman

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No offense taken, and understood re: the difference in quality between sites. But alot of what some evangelical folks may take for granted among themselves, may also need to be moderated on a much more mixed site like eHarmony (albeit founded by "an ordained Christian Minister/Pastor").

Just as you'd like your sensitivities respected, note that some of us may instead regard matters of religion as a very personal & private affair. So that the subtle (and not so subtle) proselytizing of evangelicals (or just "wearing their religion on their sleeve") can sometimes feel uncomfortable (if not rude). But that's obviously less of an issue when amongst "your own" in a specifically "christian" site.
Thank you for your mature and honest response. May I just say that, I, too, avoid and close anyone who tries to proselytize me. On eHarmony, I only allow Catholics to be matched with me so I do not have to wade through profiles I would never accept in the first place-yes, I do ocassionally receive a young man who is only "Catholic" by virtue of his family, but I can see it right away and close them immediately. I am a fervent Catholic and will talk to anyone who asks and really wants to hear my answers but I am definitely NOT about making others believe what I do. I have a degree in Theology and am a former cloistered nun (yes, really) but none of that gives me the right to force my beliefs on others. Even the Catholic Church would say the same-I know, many Catholics have forced people to convert but that is NOT the teaching of the Catholic Church. Reality is that we are human, no matter what we believe or what type of standards we live by, and alas, will make mistakes, which will reflect on others, be it our family, friends, business, country or religious organization.
Peace to you!
- September 4th, 2009, 04:54 pm
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captnc46's Avatar

captnc46 New season of Family Guy is here.

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You can tell it's a free communication weekend. I just got handed sixteen matches. Twelve of them didn't have any photos and to say the profiles were incomplete is a huge understatement. I closed those right now. Of the four that were left two might as well have left their profiles completely blank and one of the two remaining closed the match. I'm not really interested in the one lonely one left but she gets an "A" for filling everything out and having a photo and not putting some of those lame responses in that many in here have already mentioned.
I'd also like to chime in about the whole motorcycle thing. I started riding about 35 years ago when I got my first mini bike. I love riding. I've taken trips around the country on one and they were awsome trips. I've had matches say in their profiles that they hate motorcycles and will close or not date someone who rides. After reading those I moved my photo of me on one of my bikes to the primary photo position so they all know right away. I don't mention it in my profile because I don't figure it's that important and that's something we can talk about after we get to know each other if things get that far. I don't feel riding a motorcycle defines my personality so much I need to tell all about it in my profile. I'm rambling, sorry.

Last edited by captnc46; September 4th, 2009 at 04:58 pm.
- September 4th, 2009, 04:55 pm
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HappyK's Avatar

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Teacherman25 - thank you for the laughter! I don't know what's more amusing....an occasional glance at EHarmony advice, or FaceBook!
- September 4th, 2009, 05:01 pm
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Chiara Modern, Mature, Intellectual Catholic Woman

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captnc46 wrote :
You can tell it's a free communication weekend. I just got handed sixteen matches. Twelve of them didn't have any photos and to say the profiles were incomplete is a huge understatement. I closed those right now. Of the four that were left two might as well have left their profiles completely blank and one of the two remaining closed the match. I'm not really interested in the one lonely one left but she gets an "A" for filling everything out and having a photo and not putting some of those lame responses in that many in here have already mentioned.
I'd also like to chime in about the whole motorcycle thing. I started riding about 35 years ago when I got my first mini bike. I love riding. I've taken trips around the country on one and they were awsome trips. I've had matches say in their profiles that they hate motorcycles and will close or not date someone who rides. After reading those I moved my photo of me on one of my bikes to the primary photo position so they all know right away. I don't mention it in my profile because I don't figure it's that important and that's something we can talk about after we get to know each other if things get that far. I don't feel riding a motorcycle defines my personality so much I need to tell all about it in my profile. I'm rambling, sorry.
In my profile I have the following: My father gave me my first ATC when I was 2 years old-my mom told him to wait for me to be 3 yrs.! I have been riding ever since-now, ATV's, yet this does not define me as a person. I will say motorcycle riding is part of what makes me who I am but not saying I live, breathe and will die on a mortorcycle.
Anyone who does not like that part of me can close, fine. It is actually better for me, for them. In the long run we both would end up having regrets.
My mom is definitely NOT a motorcycle rider, yet when she married my dad she knew this would be part of her new life. Through the years she has riden the motorcycles, gone camping in tents, campers, motorhomes, etc. She really is a great woman. Not one complaint, yet I know she really does not enjoy it like we do. I know she does not regret marrying a man who has a passion for motorcycles because he is so much more than that one part of him.
- September 4th, 2009, 05:04 pm
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ming_on_mongo -Seattle transplant to NorCal... hmmm, sun good!

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Chiara wrote :
Thank you for your mature and honest response. May I just say that, I, too, avoid and close anyone who tries to proselytize me. On eHarmony, I only allow Catholics to be matched with me so I do not have to wade through profiles I would never accept in the first place-yes, I do ocassionally receive a young man who is only "Catholic" by virtue of his family, but I can see it right away and close them immediately. I am a fervent Catholic and will talk to anyone who asks and really wants to hear my answers but I am definitely NOT about making others believe what I do. I have a degree in Theology and am a former cloistered nun (yes, really) but none of that gives me the right to force my beliefs on others. Even the Catholic Church would say the same-I know, many Catholics have forced people to convert but that is NOT the teaching of the Catholic Church. Reality is that we are human, no matter what we believe or what type of standards we live by, and alas, will make mistakes, which will reflect on others, be it our family, friends, business, country or religious organization.
Peace to you!
Thank you, Chiara, I appeciate your reply!

Hey, next thing you know, we'll all be holding hands now and singing "Kumbaya"...

Last edited by ming_on_mongo; September 4th, 2009 at 05:07 pm.
- September 4th, 2009, 05:05 pm
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Chiara's Avatar

Chiara Modern, Mature, Intellectual Catholic Woman

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Thank you, Chiara, I appeciate your reply!

Hey, next thing you know, we'll all be holding hands now and singing "Kumbaya"...
Trust me when I say, I have friends from every place on the spectrum. ;-) I enjoy meeting others on whatever common ground we have together. Furthermore, there is so much to learn from everyone! When I die, I still will not have reached my capacity to learn from others. For some, docility is a gift, others a learned ability and still others, an impossibility.


p.s. I am Jewish because of my maternal blood line and my dad's side is absolutely nothing. I find all religions exciting, fascinating and worth understanding. "Kumbaya"!!!
- September 4th, 2009, 05:15 pm
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coolblue's Avatar

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No Picture is an automatic turn off for sure.
Beautiful women that have nothing else to offer that want guys that have Huge incomes.
Fat people that call themselves average. Are so many people overweight now that 25+ lbs. overweight average now?
- September 4th, 2009, 05:34 pm
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