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I just don't understand the desire to wish good luck to someone who rejected you.
Manners?

I view it as they just don't think you are a good Match.

No problem, I understand. I hope your EHarmony search goes well, and you find what you are looking for. I would hope they feel the same for me.
Thus, "Good luck with your search".

I suppose if you live your life with the view of the glass half empty, it is always rejection at its core.

I suppose you don't see any use in saying Please and Thank You anymore either?

Whats the point, right?
Especially Thank You. Its "after the fact", so it doesn't gain you anything, right?

Yet, I say Thank You all the time.
Why?
Because I like to treat people how I would be liked to be treated.
- November 3rd, 2009, 10:54 am
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ScottK wrote :
No, I was thinking in bigger terms, like knowing if our Matches are paying members or not, or perhaps evening out the unlevelness of the playing field of requiring "Height", by also requiring "Weight/Body Type".

BTW, Nudges DO work.
I HAVE had successful nudges that have led to dates.

I can't help it if your Matches don't respond to yours.
???Hmmm

At the least we can agree that nudges have been successful for you - but not me, although I've rrarely used it. And also that I have been successful going further after re-opening a match because of the good luck message.
- November 3rd, 2009, 11:17 am
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ScottK wrote :
Manners?

I view it as they just don't think you are a good Match.

No problem, I understand. I hope your EHarmony search goes well, and you find what you are looking for. I would hope they feel the same for me.
Thus, "Good luck with your search".

I suppose if you live your life with the view of the glass half empty, it is always rejection at its core.

I suppose you don't see any use in saying Please and Thank You anymore either?

Whats the point, right?
Especially Thank You. Its "after the fact", so it doesn't gain you anything, right?

Yet, I say Thank You all the time.
Why?
Because I like to treat people how I would be liked to be treated.
Why are you criticizing Oregon_Coast_Guy for what almost no one else does? Manners??
- November 3rd, 2009, 11:22 am
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i once went to a comedy show where this comedian translated the phrase "good for you" for us all - it means "F-you." everyone was rolling on the floor, for there's nothing so funny as the truth.

"good luck on your search" means the same thing.
- November 3rd, 2009, 11:29 am
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pussinboots wrote :
Why are you criticizing Oregon_Coast_Guy for what almost no one else does? Manners??
Because it just seems like both you and him actually seem to be INSULTED by the sending or receiving of that Good Luck message.

I think its just a bizarre reaction to something that I have to believe nearly all of the people on EH would consider a harmless and nice message to send/receive.

Is it strange that the message triggers a "Reopen" option?
Sure. Presumably its a bug in the system that they just haven't felt like fixing.

Its bad enough that we are all being judged by a couple Photos and a 1 page Profile. Anything that can be done to help make the process a little more nice and more friendly, I am happy to have.
- November 3rd, 2009, 11:57 am
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melman wrote :
I am confused. I never thought of this one as a request to re-open. I usually send it when someone who is obviously incompatible closes me, as way to say "yes, I agree." Or when someone closes with "based on statements in the profile, I'm not interested" as a way to say "oh yeah? same to you, hon." Just a way to confirm that the match is really closed out.
Grrrrrrrrrrrr - my computer wants to go on the blink every time I reply to someone It's just been shown the trash bin AGAIN.

I've never thought of this as a request to reopen either.

That being said, I don't like this or any of the other reasons to close. If a person closes because they're pursuing another match, why would you want to wish them good luck with their "search" - they're obviously not searching anymore if they're pursuing another match.

If they close me, I just automatically close them without any response.
- November 3rd, 2009, 12:22 pm
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CA_Gal_2009 wrote :
I don't think Melman misunderstood what you wrote, I think you're just refusing to see that maybe, just maybe, YOU are misinterpreting what the final message means.
I don't think he mistunderstood either for what it's worth.
- November 3rd, 2009, 12:27 pm
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ScottK wrote :
Because it just seems like both you and him actually seem to be INSULTED by the sending or receiving of that Good Luck message.

I think its just a bizarre reaction to something that I have to believe nearly all of the people on EH would consider a harmless and nice message to send/receive.

Is it strange that the message triggers a "Reopen" option?
Sure. Presumably its a bug in the system that they just haven't felt like fixing.

Its bad enough that we are all being judged by a couple Photos and a 1 page Profile. Anything that can be done to help make the process a little more nice and more friendly, I am happy to have.
Bizarre? If you want to attack my posts, please do it for understanding what I'm actually writing. If you go back to where I started this thread, I never mentioned anything close to about being insulted, but rather I've been confused about whether a match wants - as has happened - to be re-opened or not.
- November 3rd, 2009, 12:28 pm
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pussinboots wrote :
Bizarre? If you want to attack my posts, please do it for understanding what I'm actually writing. If you go back to where I started this thread, I never mentioned anything close to about being insulted, but rather I've been confused about whether a match wants - as has happened - to be re-opened or not.
I've read through all four pages of posts pussinboots and I can't find any that are attacking you. You asked a question and we're all giving you our responses. Don't be so sensitive about this issue. It's really no big deal.
- November 3rd, 2009, 12:33 pm
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I've read through all four pages of posts pussinboots and I can't find any that are attacking you. You asked a question and we're all giving you our responses. Don't be so sensitive about this issue. It's really no big deal.
Read them again, please. I never said I was being attacked - my posts were [for not understanding what I wrote].

You also must have missed the words "grouch", "ridiculous" and "bizarre".
- November 3rd, 2009, 12:53 pm
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